學(xué)校啊，當(dāng)我把我的孩子交給你，你保證給他怎樣的教育？今天清晨，我交給你一個(gè)歡欣誠(chéng)實(shí)又穎悟的小男孩兒，多年以后，你將還我一個(gè)怎樣的青年？ 　　――引自《我交給你一個(gè)孩子》
　　今年４月，山東沂水一位中學(xué)生揮刀砍向他的親人：他年邁的奶奶、臥病在床的父親均傷在他的刀下。他不堪學(xué)習(xí)重壓，僅僅因瑣事發(fā)生的一點(diǎn)爭(zhēng)吵，就令他煩躁不已，以至喪失理性，暴露出猙獰的一面。
　　事發(fā)不久，北京再上演悲劇。一位母親慘死于還在讀中學(xué)的兒子手下。
　　這些年，類似的事件時(shí)有所聞。這些孩子到底怎么了？每一次追問(wèn)，人們都會(huì)找出許許多多的答案。令人欣喜的是，有一種答案正在得到越來(lái)越多的認(rèn)同：我們對(duì)孩子的心理問(wèn)題關(guān)注得太少了。
　　人們習(xí)慣上只把健康理解為一個(gè)生理概念，以為身體沒(méi)病即是健康，其實(shí)，現(xiàn)代的人們對(duì)生命質(zhì)量有著更高要求，不但沒(méi)有身體的缺陷和疾病，還要生理健康、心理健康和社會(huì)適應(yīng)良好，即所謂身心俱健。正如“人”字的一撇一捺，一筆之缺，即會(huì)偏離生命航線，甚至觸礁、毀滅。
　　
　　他們?yōu)楹尾挥淇?
　　
　　在成年人眼里，現(xiàn)在的孩子無(wú)疑是幸福的，但孩子自己的評(píng)價(jià)卻大相徑庭，有相當(dāng)比重的孩子并沒(méi)有幸福感。在一個(gè)有44名小學(xué)生的班里，有17位同學(xué)說(shuō)自己的心情不愉快，20位同學(xué)說(shuō)有時(shí)愉快、有時(shí)不愉快。
　　心理健康的主要標(biāo)準(zhǔn)之一，是具有穩(wěn)定而愉快的情緒，如此多的學(xué)生感到不愉快，應(yīng)當(dāng)引起足夠的警覺(jué)。
　　一位８歲的小姑娘最羨慕她奶奶的退休生活，因?yàn)椴挥脤?xiě)作業(yè)；濟(jì)南市一位小學(xué)三年級(jí)學(xué)生為家庭作業(yè)所累，氣呼呼地告訴他的父親：死了多好，就沒(méi)有作業(yè)了！
　　厭學(xué)、自卑、考試焦慮……中小學(xué)生的許多心理問(wèn)題因?qū)W習(xí)壓力過(guò)重而起。據(jù)山東省未成年犯管教所的調(diào)查，絕大多數(shù)未成年人的犯罪道路是從討厭學(xué)習(xí)開(kāi)始的。
　　山東省精神衛(wèi)生中心主任醫(yī)師、中國(guó)心理衛(wèi)生協(xié)會(huì)兒童心理衛(wèi)生專業(yè)委員會(huì)委員翟靜率領(lǐng)的課題組對(duì)濟(jì)南市兩所重點(diǎn)中學(xué)初中一年級(jí)28個(gè)班的1667名學(xué)生進(jìn)行了調(diào)查，結(jié)果表明:59.3％的學(xué)生存有厭學(xué)情緒。以前，不愿上學(xué)的孩子主要是小學(xué)生和初中生，有的是因?yàn)槟懽有�，有的是因�(yàn)閷?duì)挫折的承受能力比較弱，學(xué)習(xí)有困難。但現(xiàn)在學(xué)生的厭學(xué)情緒就很普遍了，不光小學(xué)生、初中生高中生厭學(xué)，連大學(xué)生也厭學(xué)；不光學(xué)習(xí)不好的孩子不愿意學(xué)習(xí)，有些考試第一名的孩子也出現(xiàn)厭學(xué)情緒。翟靜說(shuō)，社會(huì)競(jìng)爭(zhēng)加劇，學(xué)習(xí)壓力過(guò)重，使一部分學(xué)生喪失了學(xué)習(xí)的樂(lè)趣，失去了內(nèi)在的學(xué)習(xí)動(dòng)力。
　　上海一所英國(guó)國(guó)際學(xué)校的經(jīng)理將中國(guó)的高考比作學(xué)生的夢(mèng)魘、家長(zhǎng)的噩夢(mèng)。她說(shuō)，高考的巨大壓力，使中國(guó)的兒童沒(méi)有童年。家長(zhǎng)望子成龍、望女成鳳，有的從孩子上幼兒園就開(kāi)始加壓。一些學(xué)校唯考分至上、升學(xué)率至上，不顧及學(xué)生的學(xué)習(xí)心理，作業(yè)沉重，考試不斷。雙層擠壓之下，學(xué)習(xí)成了孩子的苦役。有位中學(xué)老師用一句“七上八下”的俗語(yǔ)明確地告訴他的學(xué)生：每天睡七個(gè)小時(shí)的同學(xué)才能考上大學(xué)，睡八個(gè)小時(shí)的考不上。為了考大學(xué)，一些學(xué)生甚至用濃茶、咖啡強(qiáng)打精神，挑燈夜戰(zhàn)。
　　德州民營(yíng)企業(yè)家黃鳴一次談判之余，與德國(guó)的合作伙伴談起教育問(wèn)題。他對(duì)德國(guó)朋友說(shuō)：“我的女兒早上６點(diǎn)起床，７點(diǎn)準(zhǔn)時(shí)出門(mén)。重要的是，你知道她什么時(shí)候回來(lái)嗎？”德國(guó)朋友狠了狠心，猜了個(gè)3點(diǎn)半。這顯然不會(huì)是正確答案。他繼續(xù)以半個(gè)小時(shí)的幅度猜下去，加到晚上８點(diǎn)時(shí)，他再也不敢往下猜了，那口氣似乎孩子遭到了綁架。黃鳴告訴他：“我的孩子最早晚上１０點(diǎn)半回來(lái)，而且回到家還要寫(xiě)作業(yè)�！眹樀玫聡�(guó)朋友連連搖頭。他說(shuō)：“學(xué)習(xí)本是人生需要，但過(guò)重的學(xué)習(xí)壓力和不考慮學(xué)生興趣、特長(zhǎng)的教學(xué)方法，摧毀了人們的內(nèi)在學(xué)習(xí)動(dòng)力，也失去了學(xué)習(xí)的樂(lè)趣，它使人們放棄了追求真理、探究世界的精神，于個(gè)人、于民族都是悲劇。”
　　心理學(xué)家研究發(fā)現(xiàn)，相當(dāng)一部分學(xué)生的不良情緒是由學(xué)習(xí)壓力過(guò)大造成的，有的甚至因此導(dǎo)致較嚴(yán)重的心理疾病。濟(jì)南市有一位１０歲的小學(xué)生，很聰明，也很好學(xué)，父母對(duì)其管教非常嚴(yán)厲。因?yàn)橐淮慰荚嚳嫉貌粔蚶硐�，遭到老師和家長(zhǎng)的批評(píng)。孩子從此開(kāi)始厭學(xué)，一聽(tīng)說(shuō)要上學(xué)，就哭鬧、嘔吐、腹痛，怕見(jiàn)同學(xué)，經(jīng)常把自己關(guān)在家里。
　　
　　自信，在斥責(zé)聲中消失
　　
　　有位很優(yōu)秀的留美學(xué)者，說(shuō)起他的美國(guó)同事非常感慨：即使他們做得不怎么樣，他們也會(huì)說(shuō)自己是最棒的。
　　如果說(shuō)幽默是良好性情的內(nèi)核的話，那么自信就是健全人格的核心了。一個(gè)人如果缺乏自信，非但在學(xué)習(xí)和工作上難以取得成功，在生活中也很難有幸福感。但我們的教育恰恰忽視了培養(yǎng)學(xué)生的自信心。
　　孩子在幼兒園時(shí)，總會(huì)得到許多表?yè)P(yáng)，一旦進(jìn)入小學(xué)，成人們就像換了一副眼鏡，他們總是希望孩子們能有完美的表現(xiàn)，稍有差距，即會(huì)斥責(zé)。一些孩子從此開(kāi)始了灰頭土臉的生活，他們的自信心因此被一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)蠶食。
　　在傳統(tǒng)教育理念中，懲罰一直占有重要地位。雖然一些學(xué)生所犯的錯(cuò)誤只是一些雞毛蒜皮的小事，但一些老師卻不善于從積極的方面引導(dǎo)，往往簡(jiǎn)單化地一味斥責(zé)。一些教師恨鐵不成鋼，出于督促學(xué)生學(xué)習(xí)、糾正其不良習(xí)慣的本意，用懲罰的手段對(duì)待他們的錯(cuò)誤，殊不知，這種簡(jiǎn)單的教育方式可能會(huì)對(duì)學(xué)生心理造成嚴(yán)重傷害。
　　北京師范大學(xué)心理學(xué)院教授鄭日昌認(rèn)為，成人對(duì)孩子期望過(guò)高，保護(hù)過(guò)度，管制過(guò)嚴(yán)，特別是負(fù)性評(píng)價(jià)過(guò)多，會(huì)影響孩子的自我評(píng)價(jià)，挫傷其自尊心和自信心，使孩子或者膽小退縮、經(jīng)不起挫折，或者兇狠殘暴，對(duì)他人和社會(huì)充滿敵意，表現(xiàn)出極大的攻擊性和破壞性。兒童心理最突出的問(wèn)題，是由學(xué)習(xí)困難和自身性格等因素所引起的。學(xué)習(xí)上有困難的學(xué)生經(jīng)常被教師和家長(zhǎng)指責(zé)，視為無(wú)能兒、低能兒。來(lái)自外界的種種批評(píng)、不信任、猜測(cè)，強(qiáng)烈地傷害著兒童的自尊心，久而久之，形成怯懦、膽小的性格。山東師范大學(xué)附屬小學(xué)教師趙琨說(shuō)：“自卑還是自信，直接影響著對(duì)人生的態(tài)度，制約著個(gè)體的自我發(fā)展。家長(zhǎng)和教師要善于發(fā)現(xiàn)兒童的優(yōu)點(diǎn)，及時(shí)表?yè)P(yáng)，長(zhǎng)期堅(jiān)持下去，逐步開(kāi)啟兒童的自信�！�
　　
　　有愛(ài)，生命才會(huì)美麗
　　
　　近年來(lái)，校園悲劇時(shí)有發(fā)生。有些挫折和打擊，在成人看來(lái)可能算不上什么，但卻往往引起一些學(xué)生心理的巨大波動(dòng)。別人看似漫不經(jīng)心的一句話，就會(huì)在一些學(xué)生心中埋下仇恨的種子，令人難以置信地形成人際關(guān)系的緊張。
　　雖然，類似事件只是發(fā)生在個(gè)別有嚴(yán)重心理障礙或心理疾病的學(xué)生身上，但心理問(wèn)題卻是每一位學(xué)生隨時(shí)都可能遇到的。在學(xué)習(xí)、生活、人際交往和自我意識(shí)等方面，他們可能會(huì)遇到或產(chǎn)生這樣那樣的心理問(wèn)題，如果不能及時(shí)解決，將會(huì)對(duì)他們的健康成長(zhǎng)產(chǎn)生不良影響，嚴(yán)重的會(huì)出現(xiàn)行為障礙或人格缺陷。據(jù)山東省精神衛(wèi)生中心主任醫(yī)師翟靜的研究，目前，厭學(xué)、人際關(guān)系緊張、情緒不穩(wěn)定、社會(huì)適應(yīng)能力差等心理問(wèn)題比較普遍地影響著學(xué)生的身體和心理健康。
　　著名心理學(xué)家、北京師范大學(xué)教授林崇德提出，教育的目標(biāo)是培養(yǎng)全面發(fā)展的人，全面發(fā)展包括身、心兩個(gè)方面都得到健康發(fā)展。他認(rèn)為，健康不僅是傳統(tǒng)意義上身體健康，還包含良好的精神狀態(tài)、健全的適應(yīng)社會(huì)的能力。北京師范大學(xué)心理學(xué)院教授鄭日昌將人的素質(zhì)二分為身體素質(zhì)和心理素質(zhì)，相應(yīng)地將教育二分為體育和心育。
　　中小學(xué)生越來(lái)越多的心理問(wèn)題，引起了全社會(huì)的關(guān)注。上世紀(jì)80年代，心理健康教育在一些省市陸續(xù)開(kāi)展起來(lái)。如今，全國(guó)許多中小學(xué)校都設(shè)立了心理咨詢室，有的還配備了專職的心理輔導(dǎo)教師，對(duì)學(xué)生心理素質(zhì)的提高發(fā)揮了一定作用。但在應(yīng)試教育的條件下，面對(duì)升學(xué)的巨大壓力，在一些人眼里，心理健康教育還只是一項(xiàng)可有可無(wú)的工作。有的人不承認(rèn)一些學(xué)生存在心理健康問(wèn)題，或者把心理健康問(wèn)題簡(jiǎn)單地看作思想品德問(wèn)題、缺乏法制觀念等，試圖用老一套辦法解決新時(shí)期的新問(wèn)題。有的學(xué)校把復(fù)雜問(wèn)題簡(jiǎn)單化，在硬件設(shè)施上做文章，搞形式主義的花架子。有的人把心理健康教育知識(shí)化，熱衷于編課本、講概念、考條條，甚至企圖通過(guò)教學(xué)解決學(xué)生的心理問(wèn)題。
　　老師一句鼓勵(lì)的話甚至一個(gè)微笑，可能會(huì)使一個(gè)“落后學(xué)生”走出自卑的陰影，樹(shù)立起自信心，從而改變一生；老師的一次嘲諷，可能傷及一個(gè)好學(xué)生的自尊心，使其產(chǎn)生對(duì)他人、對(duì)社會(huì)的敵對(duì)情緒。鄭日昌教授認(rèn)為，心理健康教育是學(xué)校、家庭、社區(qū)及媒體的共同任務(wù)，作為學(xué)校來(lái)說(shuō)，心理健康教育要面向所有學(xué)生，教職員工全員參與，將其滲透在學(xué)校的各科教學(xué)和日常管理之中。他說(shuō)：“接納學(xué)生，尊重學(xué)生，以學(xué)生為本，是心育成功的關(guān)鍵�！�
　　
　　School, when I entrust my child to you, what kind of education can you promise to give him? This morning, I gave you a happy, honest, and smart boy. Many years later, what a kind of young man will you return to me?
　　In April this year, a secondary school student of Yishui in Shandong Province went crazy and cut his family members with a knife. His old grandmother and his father lying in bed for sickness were both wounded by his knife. The reason why he went crazy is that he could not put up with the heavy pressure of studies. Therefore, just because of some trivial affair, he quarreled with his family members, which made him so stressed out that he lost his reason and committed the crime.
　　People are used to regarding health as a physiological concept, always thinking that health only means having a body free of sickness. In fact, modern human beings have higher requirements when it comes to the quality of life. Thus, “good health” means not only physiological health (a body free of defects and sickness), but also psychological health (of the mind and emotions) and the ability to adapt to society and live harmoniously with others.
　　In the eyes of some adults, children of the present-day are happy. However, appraisals received from the children themselves are very different. Many children do not feel happy at all. In one primary school class with 44 students, 17 children reported that they rarely have happy feelings; and 20 children said they are sometimes happy and sometimes not.
　　Recently, a research group headed by Zhai Jing, a chief physician at Shandong Mental Sanitation Center and a member of the Children Psychological Sanitation Committee of the China Psychological Association, has made an investigation among 1667 students from 28 classes of junior grade one at two key secondary schools in Jinan. The results reveal that 59.3% of the students are school-weary. Zhai Jing says that the aggravated social competition and overwhelming study pressure have made part of the students lose their interest in study and inner motivation to study.
　　Research by psychologists reveals that some part of the bad mood of the students is caused by overly heavy study pressure, which in some cases can even cause serious psychological illness. There is one case in Jinan of a normal ten-year old primary school student, who used to be very clever and fond of learning. His parents were very strict with him and had high expectations for him. On one occasion, however, because he failed to do as well as expected on one particular examination, he was severely criticized by his teacher and parents. As a result, the boy became school-weary. Now, upon hearing that it’s time to go to school, he will cry, vomit, have diarrhoea, and is afraid to see his classmates. What he often does is to close himself up at home.
　　An outstanding scholar returning from the United States often sighs with emotion when talking about his overseas colleagues. In the United States, even if their achievements are very ordinary, they always assert that they themselves are the best.
　　If humor is the core of a good mood, then self-confidence is the core of a healthy personality. If a person lacks self-confidence, he will neither be successful in studies, nor in life, because he will not feel happy in daily living. The Chinese system of education happens to neglect to cultivate self-confidence in our students.
　　In the kindergarten, children always obtain a lot of praise and encouragement. However, once they are admitted to primary school, adults, as if putting on a different pair of colored glasses, suddenly expect children to behave perfectly all the time. Once they make even a minor mistake, the children are chided, sometimes harshly. As a result, the self-confidence of the children will be eroded little by little.
　　In the traditional idea of education, punishment has always taken up an important position. Though the mistakes made by some students are minor, some teachers often attempt to educate them by the simple means of confrontation and criticism, rather than correction Ñ directing them towards the positive aspects and showing them the proper way to arrive at the right conclusion. This kind of educational method may bring about serious damage to the psyche of the students, for they may come to see themselves as incapable of learning.
　　Zheng Richang, a professor at the Psychology School of Beijing Teachers’ University, thinks that adults usually have expectations that run too high for most children, while also exerting contradictory pressures on the children by being both overly protective and overly strict in their controls. Sometimes, overwhelming negative appraisals from the adults will also exercise negative influences on the self-appraisals of the children and hurt their self-esteem and self-confidence, making the children timid and less inclined to risk the failures that normally result from creativity.
　　In addition, the children sometimes become fierce and malicious or hostile towards others in their families, in their classrooms and in society, exhibiting an aggressive and destructive character. The most prominent psychological problems of children are caused by their difficulties in studies and their own character. Students that have difficulties in study are often chided by their teachers and parents, and sometimes are even regarded as inept and retarded children. Such outside criticisms may lead to a lack of confidence, hurt the self-esteem of the children, and gradually will make their character become cowardly and timid.
　　Zhao Kun, a teacher at the Primary School affiliated with Shandong Teachers’ University, says: “For a child to be self-abased or self-confident, directly exerts a tremendous influence on his attitude towards life and either restrains or enhances his self-development as an individual person. Parents and teachers should be good at discovering children’s merits and praise them accordingly. Praise appropriately and consistently given will gradually lead to increased self-confidence in children.”
　　In recent years, adversities have frequently happened in schools. In the eyes of adults, some defeats and attacks may mean almost nothing; however, the perception by the pupils themselves might be quite different, for the treatment they receive from parents and teachers always has a heavy impact on the psychology of the students. A word that means nothing to adults sometimes will sow hostile seeds in the heart of students, and these seeds will grow until they finally bring about strained personnel relationships.

相關(guān)熱詞搜索：傾斜 之重 教育 傾斜的教育之重 重教育 重德教育